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Letter To Her
“Tell me one good reason why I shouldn’t kill myself right now”. It’s never good when one of your best friends calls you crying and when that’s the first thing you hear when you answer, it’s never good. So many thoughts and emotions were running through my mind when he told me that you broke up with him. Part of me was happy, and I know that sounds so wrong, but it’s true. After what he had been going through that day because you were ignoring him, it’s what he needed.. and yeah, it gives me and him a better chance at having something more than a friendship which him and I have talked about more than once. Even though part of me was happy, the majority of me was pissed off, scared, worried, and sad. I was worried because you and I both know how unpredictable he can bee. I was sad because I know how much he loved you. I didn’t think he had it in him to cry. He’s always been so strong and I thought it would take a lot more than that to break him how you did. You said that you were there for him, but that’s bullshit, I was there more for him than you were. Who was he calling in the middle of the night just to talk and who answered the phone when he called and who was he calling when he was worried about you? Me. I felt like I was more of a girlfriend to him then you were. You just don’t see it. He loved you with all of his being and you went and threw him away. And for what? Because you have psychotic issues that you took out on him, even though he has enough of his own problems to deal with, he took yours on too. The night you broke his heart I had so many people mad at me because I was supposed to be out with my friends having a good time. But he kept calling and I answered EVERY single time because he was my first and most important priority. I didn’t want to see him do anything stupid. I’ve already lost a lot of people in my life that I love and I couldn’t stand to lose him because of the games that you played with him. I don’t know what this has done for you, but its helped me tremendously. If I wouldn’t have wrote this I would have ended up yelling or beating the shit out of you and I didn’t want to do either one of these things. I would die for him, that’s how much I love him, would you have died for him? This started out as a poem but it obviously didn’t end that way….
Blog Category: Writing and Poetry
Current mood: pissed off
Added on: 29/02/2008 07:38:58
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One Of These Days
One of these days you're going to realize
You're going to realize how much you need me
One of these days you're going to see
You're going to see how much you love me
One of these days you're going to come back
And I may not be here.
I loved you once, but you hurt me adn
I don't know if I could ever trust you again
As I've trusted you once before
One of these daysyou're going to want me
You're going to want me,
But what if I've found someone else?
Then there won't be room for you.
Then what?
It's going to hurt you
And you know that I can't stand to see you hurt
Especially knowing that I'm the one who is the source of that pain.
One of these days I'm going to realize
I'm going to realize how much i need you
One of these days I'm going to see
I'm going to see that you truely did love me
One of these days I'm going to come back
And you'll be there because I'm the only one
I'm the only one that's ever loved and understood you
One of these days I'm going to want you
And you'll want me too...
Blog Category: Writing and Poetry
Current mood: pissed off
Added on: 28/02/2008 10:40:17
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For The Love Of Music Or An Easy Grade?...
i'm in both orchestras at my school, symphony and concert, symphony obviously being tha better of tha two. it has always been that if an upper and a lower classman are competing for tha same chair, it goes to tha upper classmen, because well obviously theyre tha upper classman and they wont be here for as long as tha lower classman. im perfectly fine with being a second violin for symphony orchestra because i know that im not as good as tha first violins, but it REALLY bothers me that i sit in tha very back and there are people that sit in front of me that should actually sit behind me and im not just saying this because i am a senior and so that obviously makes me tha upperclassman but becuase im a better player than these people. some people are just saying this because they think that i dont like my stand partner, but thats not true.
in concert orchestra i sit 4th chair first violin, but tha three kids that are in front of me are all sophmores, and only one of them should be sitting where she is in tha setup because she is an amazing violinist. tha other two arent that great and im a better player but my teacher doesnt really like me so she looks past my playing ability and looks at tha fact that she doesnt like me.
another thing that gets to me is that there are people who are in symphony who shouldnt and there are kids in concert that should be moved up to symphony, because they are just that good. and it bothers me even more that most of tha kids in orchestra this year arent there for tha music but just because its an "easy A".....does anyone else see whats wrong with this
Blog Category: School, College, Greek
Current mood: annoyed
Added on: 28/02/2008 06:56:14
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(Untitled)
Stalking silently through
Darkness
Drunk with
Rage.
I need to taste the
Sweetness of blood
That belongs to someone so
Innocent and pure.
I emerge into a
Clearing.
There, lying on the ground
So peacefully,
A girl.
It’s like she’s been
Placed there for me to
Consume, in whatever way I please.
I’m taken aback,
I just stand there and,
Watch her breath steadily.
I can not control myself
Any longer
I must go to her and
Sink my fangs into her
Soft, warm flesh.
I don’t even remember moving
But here I am,
Kneeling on the ground,
Over her body.
I raise her up,
Into my arms,
And look into her face.
I push her hair
Off of her neck and
Slowly lower my head
And pierce her flesh
With my razor sharp fangs,
Ending the pain she has not yet known,
Relief flooding over me
As I save her mortal soul and taste the
Sweetness.
Blog Category: Writing and Poetry
Current mood: sleepy
Added on: 28/02/2008 06:53:40
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escape
She spins faster and faster
Tightening her circles
Small and compact
Becoming dizzy as always
Loving the feeling of
Almost getting sick before
She falls down
Into the darkness
She hates thinking about it but
It always Creeps
Into her mind, uninvited
So she spins
She spins as fast
As she can
Before she hits
Darkness again
This is her
Escape
Her escape from
Everything
Blog Category: Writing and Poetry
Current mood: sleepy
Added on: 28/02/2008 06:52:53
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