Gone So Young
This song has helped me through a lot especially the loss of my grandpa. I can p
I never dreamt it'd be this way
I've lost any chance for me to say
To say that I miss you, say that I love you
Will someone please tell me I'm okay?
I wasn't prepared for what's to come
A life made of memories, gone so young
and now I'm regretting all I've done
But in your heart know that I'm with you all along
Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
I'm in your heart tonight
I never thought that this could go
and take me away from all I know
and leave me to think I'm on my own
but your love will take me, you were the one
who sat through nights, you held me tight
and made sure I'm okay
and I thank you for the love you gave to me
Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes. I'll make your darkest days so bright
I'm in your heart tonight
tonight
Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
Wherever you go, I will be waiting
Whenever you call, I will be there
Whatever it takes, I'll make your darkest days so bright
and if I fall I know you're waiting
and if I should call I know you're there
I ever you cry just know I'm in your heart tonight
I'm in your heart tonight
Blog Category: Life
Playing (Music): Carrie Underwood
Current mood: tired
Added on: 22/03/2007 16:50:11
Comments (1)
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my own worst enemy
Sometimes I’m afraid to get up in the morning. There are certain things about myself that I hate and I don’t think they will ever go away. Sometimes I think it would be so much easier to sleep my life away. But then again I don’t want to sleep my life away because there are people out there who believe I’m a nobody and believe I always will be one. I want to prove them wrong. I want them to kick themselves for doubting me and regret belittling in any shape or form. Life is a battle and it sucks when your downs last a hell of a lot longer than your highs do. I have huge expectations and dreams for myself and deep down I guess I always new that I wouldn’t fulfill them but lately is become more and obvious that I probably won’t be who I really want to be deep down. But the scary thing is that I can’t picture myself in the real world. I really can’t. sometimes I think that something is going to happen to me and I’m not talking suicide. That’s not me, I wouldn’t do it. The truth is death is probably my greatest fear. One of the things that has probably helped me make it this far is that I’m a great actress. I’m good at making you believe that I am a very confident person even though in reality I have almost none. I’m good at smiling and laughing on the outside when on the inside I’m dying. I’m good at making you believe that everything’s okay when really my world is crashing down. My eyes say a lot. So most of the time when i am lying, the people who know me the best, mainly my friends, can look into my eyes and know the truth. Most of the time when I tell someone that I’m fine, I’m lying. My fine means that I’m Fucked up, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional. F.I.N.E. and don’t think that I’m all emo and depressed all of the time. I can be a very happy person and I usually am when I’m around my friends. I’m a VERY hard critic on myself. I mean extremely hard. There probably isn’t one belittling thing that someone can say about me that I haven’t already said to myself. So when people do say things about me, and since I’ve probably already said it to myself, I tend to believe that it’s true even more. I am a negative person and I try to be more positive but change is hard for me. I’m not a persistent person and I tend to give up easily. So all in all I Am My Own Worst Enemy.
Blog Category: Blogging
Playing (Music): Fall Out Boy, duh
Current mood: apathetic
Added on: 16/09/2006 14:37:09
Comments (2)
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i hate people
(original written on 8-30-06)
I hate people. They fucking annoy the crap out of me. I'm not a very confident person. Even though I'm very good at making you believe that I am. But that doesn't mean you can belittle me. I do that to myself already. Last night at the reburning, John comes up to me yanks on my tie and says, "Who are you trying to be, Green Day?" I have to admit that really pissed me off. I'm not trying to anyone but my own fucking self. I love my tie. I would wear it everyday to school if I had the confidence to stand up to all the preps and the haters who insist on belittleing the fuck out of me just because I insist on being an individual. Even my own best friend belittles me at times. Probably not on purpose but she does. In her own little Pokey way she can really make me feel like crap. It really pissed me off when she called me a scenester on my birthday. I'm not a fucking scenester! I am me. Nothing more. Nothing less. I hate the way she calls me emo like it's a bad thing. And not to mention that I have not once called myself emo. I don't even dress emo. She says my personality is emo. um...okay. Oh, and when people do try to belittle me, I'm more likely to beat the fucking shit out of them than go cry about it or cut myself over it. I'm not a cutter. Sometimes I wonder why I call these people my friends. Sometimes I think I'm better off alone.
Blog Category: Blogging
Playing (Music): Fall Out Boy (cuz they r my favorite band n never fail 2 cheer me up)
Current mood: annoyed
Added on: 31/08/2006 13:11:53
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